The Restoration of a Father

On March 15, 1996 at 4:07pm, my dad became a father for the first time. With courage & strength he vowed to love this child as Christ had loved him. Shortly after the first born, two more came along. This loving father of three fought to pursue honesty, bravery, and gentleness for the sake of his children. Like all of us, he faced many trials…. he failed, he grew, he gained confidence, he lost confidence, he yearned for Christ, and he drifted from Christ.
Pressure weighed heavy on my dad’s shoulders to be there for my siblings and I, as his own father had never been there for him. The weight of rejection from his father could not help but seep into his heart and his parenting. My dad strived to be at every one of our softball games and cross country meets, something his father only did for him one singular time. He was going to be different from his father… He was going to love better, serve better, cherish time better… and he did, but in all of his striving to do and be better, his soul still mourned his father’s rejection of him.

As my siblings and I grew older, the Lord continually softened our dad’s heart to deeply understand that no good work could bring about the healing and restoration that he needed. He needed the gentle and loving hand of his heavenly Father, guiding his every thought and action, renewing him day by day, moment by moment, to be molded into the father he was created to be. Not the father who strives ceaselessly for little gain from a place of pain and anger, but the father who strives selflessly for great gain from a place of healing and joy.

My dad’s heavenly Father restored what his earthly father could not.

Soon, his efforts to love his children became glorious. Not that his love was lacking before, but now his love was radiant. It was unmissable, unforgettable, and incomparable. My dad became strong and steady, a firm foundation rested in Christ alone. He was relentless in his pursuit of Christ, and an absolute force to be reckoned with as he learned how to heal and love from a place of honest forgiveness. He no longer strived to sustain himself, instead he began to rely on the grace of God to sustain him and his faith.

My dad learned to embody the reality of Colossians 3:12-17, which I heavily encourage you to read often, study well, and live out fully. Through prioritizing Christ, he naturally fell into a state of mind that invited forgiveness, love, gratefulness, and unity. The more my dad sought after Christ, the more able he was to love my siblings and I in the way that Christ loved him, just as he had longed to do from the very beginning.

So, to all the fathers who may feel weary, tired, or heavy-laden, may my father be a shining and encouraging example for you. Restoration, healing, forgiveness, joy, and unforgettable love is possible with Christ. The Lord beckons you to rest in His peace. To all the fathers who may feel like they are lost or unsure of how to love their kids well, study how your heavenly Father loves you, and reflect that with your own children.

Nothing is too broken for the Lord to fix, especially you.

To my father, thank you for loving me well, being hilariously fun, being a resilient man of Christ, and for leading the family by such a selfless example.

I love you, Happy Father’s Day!







Colossians 3:12-17
12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.