Begin Again
“Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.“
Psalm 51:10
New year, new me… right? Our culture is so focused on self improvement and self focus, to the extent that every year, we feel the societal pressure to recreate ourselves. If we could just “try harder” or strive more to reach the culture’s materialistic ideal or self imposed standards we desire, then this may finally be the year we reach our happiness. We make new goals to achieve the things that we think will bring us the growth or wholeness we desire. And for the first month or two of the year, we stay focused and we make progress. But over time, the passion for progress wanes, and we are left in the same place that we were before, exhausted and frustrated. Now don’t get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with good goals and inspiration towards personal growth. There is a season for everything (as Ecclesiastes 3 tells us) and yes, there are times that we do grow and change and make progress towards specific things. But I wonder, how often are our personal desires and goals elevated beyond what Christ is asking of us? And do we even take the time to slow down and ask Him? From the weight loss goals, the home projects, the desired change in income or relationship status… are these things that Christ would uphold in our lives as the most important thing to strive towards? And should we be in a pattern of striving at all? Furthermore, what is the difference between putting in effort towards growth, and the type of striving that leads to exhaustion and burn out?
Additionally, I wonder if sometimes, the simple heart posture of rest, humility and daily dependance on Christ gets overlooked. After a hard year or a difficult season, after the exhaustion that comes from strained relationships or the burnout that follows seasons of investing in something or someone that failed you, sometimes, the most beautiful way to start a new year is to simply have the courage to begin again.
One of the New Year’s trends that I have enjoyed in recent years has been the concept of praying over a word for the year. Rather than making resolutions and plans to improve myself, this practice looks like taking the time at the start of a new year, to prayerfully consider, what is it that God wants to teach me this year? What aspect of His character do I need to grow in? Last year, the word I felt the Lord put on my heart was the nature of His faithfulness, and how I should be growing in faithfulness as I grow in Christ-likeness. It was a beautiful form of encouragement and sanctification for me throughout the year.
This year, I don’t feel strongly towards a word specifically, and I’m still praying about that. But what I do know is that I want to focus on the balance of true rest in Christ, and growing up in His likeness. There’s a beautiful paradox between growth and rest. They seem like such opposite concepts, but I think there is a direct spiritual correlation between them.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30
This verse sheds light on that paradox in three ways: we are supposed to come to Jesus, to take his yoke upon us, and to learn from him. And in this, we will find rest for our souls.
So let’s break that down. First, there’s the coming towards Christ. There is intention and effort in that on our part. We have to lay down our self sufficiency, we have to humble ourselves, and we have to come to Him: empty handed and submitted to His word over our own desires. I see this as spending time with the Lord, and putting on the mind of Christ by being renewed daily by His word. Then there is the concept of taking on His yoke. A yoke was a wooden contraption used to distribute weight and unite two laboring animals to work together. This imagery points to the paradox again in that we have to submit to His yoke, unite ourselves with Him, and keep in step with him as we move forward in this life. It’s a heart posture of submission. Finally, there is the step of learning from him. He qualifies this command with “for I am gentle and humble in heart.” In other words, we can trust Him; there is safety in submitting to Him and learning from Him. And we should put our focus on actively learning from Him. The end product of these action steps towards Christ, is His promise that we will find rest for our souls. The rest does not come BECAUSE of the work we put in, but rather it is the result of a life lived near the heart of Christ. Come to Him. Submit to Him. Learn from Him.
This leads me to my thoughts on striving vs putting the effort in for spiritual growth. In my experience, the best way to differentiate the two is this: striving is where we rely on our own strength to achieve things we think will bring us satisfaction or right standing with God, while the simple obedience of putting in the effort it takes to grow in Christ has a component of reliance on Christ Himself to facilitate the progress. One leads to burn out and shame when we fail, and the other leads to an endurance and encouragement to keep going, even when we fail or falter. One is closely tied to perfectionism, and the other rests on grace.
So as we enter 2023, let’s take the time to do a heart check and spend some time in prayer. What are your goals and visions for this year? Is the Lord putting a specific word on your heart? Where do you land on the spectrum of self reliance and striving vs abiding in Christ, submitting to His direction for our lives, and learning from Him?
Maybe you have found a good balance of setting healthy goals and growing in Christ. Or maybe you’re feeling the need to adjust. Maybe you feel bogged down with the times you’ve tried to establish new goals and habits and it feels like a never ending cycle of effort and failure. Whatever the case, I encourage you to simply have the heart posture of one who is submitted to Christ, be humble and lowly like Him, ready to simply begin again.